Let’s say you met a special person, you liked each other and one morning you woke up in the same bed. Perhaps you feel all those well-known butterflies in your stomach and already plan an upcoming weekend or even think about names for your future kids. Still, all of sudden, the man changes and your romantic venture is about to finish. Why do guys distance themselves after intimacy? This is what we are going to discuss today.
There are so many situations when a guy disappeared after hooking up when it seemed that everything is serious between you two. He presented flowers, wrote dirty texts, arranged dates, and was so attentive in general. Unfortunately, it is a common issue that many girls face every day. Actually, such stories prevent some women from beginning a romance as they can’t know for sure what intentions a man has. This is when ladies start wondering why do guys distance themselves after intimacy. What was wrong? What is their fault? Breathe out! This article aims to provide you with all the common reasons why do guys pull away after intimacy.
He is Distant After Intimacy – Why Does He Want to Stop?
It should be stated that there are many reasons why man pulls away after intimacy. While some girls are sure that something wrong is with them, the reality is the opposite. But let’s not jump to conclusions and discuss everything in detail.
1. He changed his opinion
Why do guys become distant after intimacy? Well, the man may just change his opinion. He liked you, you had a great time together, maybe even visited some cool places or got acquainted with friends. But there is no guarantee that your feelings will last forever. The man may just lose interest in keeping your communication and dating alive. Sometimes you can hear an offer to leave everything as it is, and be friends. It is really a common end for couples today. Some of them even are able to become good friends and then spend time with new lovers. The best thing about such a situation is that you will not waste your time as the guy is frank with his feelings and intentions.
2. He wanted only one – night stand
Let’s face the truth. One of the most common reasons why he pulls away after intimacy is that he wanted to have one-time sex with you. Of course, he told you that you were the best woman he had ever met and dozens of other pleasant things that all girls would like to hear. He might even not promise you anything in the future, but you painted a happy ever after in your head on your own. You had an amazing night together and the next day he stopped to answer your calls. In fact, this is how many acquaintances finish and there is nothing wrong with it. Of course, if no take into account all your hopes. But it is about your expectations, and it is you who will have to cope with your ruined dreams.
3. You were too annoying
This is another reason why men withdraw after intimacy. Even if you liked each other and spent a great night together, everything may end the next day. It is because you were too clingy. In other words, you started to discuss plans for the future just after intercourse. The man could enjoy the moment as you started to ask what names for kids he liked, or where you could go the next summer. In other cases, the girl starts to write messages every minute or call every hour. As a result, the man is fed up with such an annoying woman and wants to leave as soon as possible.
4. He is afraid of getting closer
You may be surprised but guys also may experience difficulties with building trusted relationships because of previous traumas. They simply do not know what to do and how to act. That’s why it is easier for them to distance themselves. These men do not want to be hurt anymore as it took them too much time to cope with a previous failure. That’s why they practice going away once they feel that the girl wants more than they are ready to give right at the moment.
5. He didn’t like sex with you
Even if all your previous sexual partners told you that sex was just incredible, it doesn’t mean that it would be so with everybody. The guy might have different preferences, and it is his full right. Some people have absolutely opposite views and likes, meaning that their compatibility is low. It may happen to you as well. There is no doubt that some men could manage to satisfy you 100%.
6. He is not sure about his feelings
It happens that he pulls away after intimacy just because he is not sure about his feelings. Such a man doesn’t want to break your heart and prefers to leave at once. Maybe he needs more time to realize that you are the one he needs but right at the moment, he is not ready to move further together. He may even like you, and sex was just good, but that’s all that he can give you.
7. He wants to slow down
Based on answers to why do guys distance themselves after intimacy Reddit, it is possible to say that the man prefers slowing down. He may be too busy to meet regularly, or his attention is focused on other things now. Anyway, he wants to live his ordinary life instead of getting into a close relationship with you, even if he sincerely likes you. It means that he is ready to meet with you sometimes, but not on a regular basis.
8. He thinks he was bad
Why does he pull away after intimacy? The next reason may surprise you a lot but it really exists. Some men think that they acted not very well and are afraid to approach you again. Such cases destroy their self-confidence and they prefer to distance themselves rather than discuss things like that with the girl who they like. Instead, he keeps thinking that he performed awfully and no girl would agree on building a relationship with him.
9. He wanted to check you
Finally, the man may be eager to check your attitude and true feelings. In other words, he wants to be with you, but he is not sure that you want the same, or are ready to make this relationship work out. Mind that this is not a common issue at all, but yes, it is one of the reasons why he may get distant after a hot night of wild sex. After all, men also have souls and they do not want to be hurt by women.
What to Do When a Man Pulls Away After Intimacy?
So, now you have read all the possible reasons why do guys distance themselves after intimacy. But what next? What should you do with this information? Let’s see how you can act afterward.
Encourage him to talk directly
Well, you had a great night together, and then the man distant himself. The first idea that may appear in your head is to discuss everything, and it is quite okay. here you should remember that the guy has no obligations, as well as you have no right to accuse him about anything. You can use this conversation to ask questions and clear up the situation, and actually, that is all. Avoid being rude, or saying things that you will regret later. Take it just as an opportunity to receive a chance to get closer and try to build a connection. But make sure that you are ready to hear things that may be not very pleasant for you.
Give him some space
Another thing that you can do when the guy becomes distant is to give him space as well. This way you will let him think over everything well, and decide what he actually wants. As a result, the guy would not feel any pressure, and such freedom is the best option to decrease the distance between you two in the long run. Otherwise, you risk making him irritated and surely refuse to build any connection with you.
Prove you are happy and independent
Let’s calm down and think well once again. What chances does a couple have for a happy future when one person obsesses over another one? Perhaps, minimal. A guy should know that you can live on your own, that you have a bright life, and do not cry into the pillow before going to bed. That’s why you are recommended to show that you are independent and your life doesn’t stop if you do not have relationship with him. So, just enjoy your life, develop yourself, go out with your friends and think twice before letting him back into your routine.
People meet and separate every single day. Some couples celebrate grand wedding days and live a happy life together, while others break connection almost at once. Nobody knows whether a particular person is their destiny. It is all about attempts, successes, and failures. Having the information on why do guys distance themselves after intimacy may prevent you from making serious mistakes. Mind mentioned recommendations and remember that relationship is what should make you happy, otherwise, it has no sense. After all, life is too short to suffer from pain and stress. There is somebody special who is waiting for you right the corner.
Margaret Pan is a renowned dating expert and coach, known for her expertise in helping individuals find meaningful and fulfilling relationships. With over a decade of experience in the field, Margaret has helped numerous clients improve their dating and relationship skills, boost their confidence, and find their ideal partners.