is she using me?

Is She Using Me: How to Understand True Feelings of Your Girl?

It goes without saying that the dating world has always been very complicated. It is full not only of sweet kisses, warm hugs, and romantic dinners. Here, you are to deal with plenty of other issues, and not always the process is pleasant. At some point, you may ask yourself a number of different questions: “Do we match each other?”, “Can we really build a happy connection?”, etc. Unfortunately, due to some reasons some guys even are wondering “Is she using me?”. If you recognize yourself and want to make sure that the girl by your side has real romantic feelings for you, then keep reading. This article will reveal the main signs that prove the girl really uses you for her own purposes. 

Does She Really Love Me or Is She Using Me?

It is great when two people love each other and build a happy relationship together. Still, not all partners equally contribute to their commitment. If at some moment, you understand that something goes wrong between you and your significant other, then it is high time to learn “Is she using me for money”, or any suchlike purpose. These signs will help you make the right conclusions and decide what to do next. 

There is no emotional connection between you 

Is she using me for a green card? This and other similar questions may arise in the guy’s mind when he feels some discomfort.  Emotional connection is crucial for partners, and its lack means that your relationship does not develop naturally.  Is she just using me for attention? Surely. She just needs some person to spend time with, but she is not about installing a warm emotional connection. In this case, you can’t know for sure what makes her happy, or what irritates her. It would be also difficult to understand her true feelings as emotional intimacy between you two is just bad.

You are not a priority for her

Is she using me quiz suggests looking at your relationship and analyzing it. Does your girl remember your meetings and always come on time? Or does she constantly change her plans because of unexpected circumstances? If yes, then she doesn’t take your relationship seriously and you are not a priority to her. There is always something more important, urgent, and desired than spending time with you. Moreover, you meet only when she wants it or has time for it. Is she using me for attention? Probably yes. 

is she using me to make her boyfriend jealous

She always asks for money

Is she just using me for my money? It may be so if you constantly hear about finances. She may wait for expensive gifts and dinners at the top restaurants, expecting you to pay all the time. Of course, it is okay for a man to be responsible for expenditures, but not under pressure or high expectations. So, you may suspect that something goes wrong if you are covering all her expenses, and keep hearing that she needs something else. 

She doesn’t include you in her future plans

Do you discuss some plans for the future? We mean those cozy conversations like “I’d like to have a two-stored house in the future with three little kids, and you by my side…” In case you do not hear your own name in a girl’s plans no matter what aspect of life they refer to, it may say that she is just using you for some purposes at a definite moment. She doesn’t care whether you will be present in her life later. Is she using me to fill a void? Yes, it may be exactly so. 

She flirts with other guys

Did you notice that your girl is flirting with other people? What way do you feel at that moment? Perhaps, not great. Is she using him to make me jealous? Yes, this is a common scenario. But if she is flirting with other guys just because she likes it, this is a true reason to think that you mean nothing to her. In case the girl meets somebody better, taller, richer, or whatever man is perfect for her, she would leave you at once. Flirty communication may be different, and in case she crosses all possible lines – it is a signal for you to think well whether the right girl is by your side. 

is she using no contact on me

She doesn’t appreciate things that you do

Do you try to woo a woman and make the life of your significant other a real pleasure with small and big things? Great! But if she doesn’t appreciate this, then the answer to your question “Is she just using me” is evident.  In this case, that girl takes things for granted and doesn’t appreciate any of your effort. Eventually, you do not see any appreciation or reciprocation. If this is what you face all the time, then there is no sense to keep doing either small cute things or big amazing surprises. She is just using you for own purpose. 

Her family doesn’t know about your existence

You may suspect she is using me for sex or any other aim if the girl refuses to place labels. Her family may even do not know who you are and what is going on between you two. All this says that you mean nothing to her. Is she using me for emotional support and money? Yes! It looks like that. Otherwise, she would like everybody to know about your existence and your romance. Actually, girls who are in love with a man, and dream to build an awesome relationship, keep posting pictures and telling their dearest about a special man in their life. 

Some friends say she is using you

It happens that you do not need to take “Is she using me for attention quiz” to understand the situation as your friends are warning you.  Perhaps you do not want to listen to them at first, but soon, you realize that they may be right.  Actually, your good friends know you well, and they can see a situation from another angle. What if they are right? Is she using me for validation? It may be so as well.

Her behavior is hot and cold

Is she always present in your life or is your communication changing from cold to hot and vice versa? Of course, it is okay for a girl’s behavior and mood to be changeable, but not so drastically. In this case, the answer to the question “Does she like me or is she using me” will not be very pleasant. Perhaps, you, like a person, are not interesting to her. She just wants to spend some time not feeling bored, or cover her financial expenditures with your help. Actually, the reasons may be different. Still, if the girl really cares about you and your relationships – she would not play any hot and cold games. 

is she using me emotionally

She doesn’t want to see any problems in your relationship

Today, most people understand that physical attraction and emotional connection are cool. But even if your connection seems to be perfect, there is something that you can improve or change totally. In case your girl does not want to notice any problems or weak points and work at them, then she probably is not interested in building a serious connection with you. In this case, all your attempts to start any discussion ends with failure. She simply doesn’t want to confess that something is not perfect and requires improvement. It is the way to nowhere. Is she using me to get over her ex? Yes, it may be one of the reasons why she doesn’t want to work at her current commitment.

Her words do not coincide with her actual actions

Try to analyze everything that your girlfriend says. Are these words sweet and pleasant? It is really cool, but only if they correspond to her actions. Otherwise, they have no sense. Let’s say she promised to call you after the party with her colleagues but didn’t do that. It happens, right? But if she promises not to forget to call you the next time and acted the same way again, then it means there is a big difference between her words and actions. Of course, it is only one example, but you probably got the idea.

Related reading: Mind Games in Relationships: Meaning, Signs, and Examples

Let’s Recap

It happens that your thought “she is using me for attention or smth else”  has some ground and not everything is as fine as it may seem to be at first glance. Use the discussed signs to make a final conclusion. Is she using me as a rebound, or as some kind of support(emotional or financial)? You will be able to answer this question after attentive learning of all signs and critical analysis of your relationship. Yes, at first, it may be difficult and even scary to face the truth. But, it is better to do it at once than regret the waste of time and effort afterward. Every person is worth having a nice relationship with a partner who really cares. What if your significant other has another plan and “Is she using me” question gets actual for you? We sincerely hope that this article will help you clarify everything, and get rid of all your hesitations. 

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  1. Joseph
    Wow this article helped me a lot on how to know about the girl’s how they use us for there needs.
    I’ve seen some of my friends break down and feel stressed after their girlfriends cheated on them.

  2. Wow! I really enjoyed reading this article. Thank you for these useful insights. It’s Very true that the dating world is very complicated. Don’t fall into the trap of being hypnotically stuck on one person who is using you. Please keep an eye on the red flags highlighted by this article. I have seen some of my friend’s crumble and left stressed after girlfriends duped them.

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